April Foolishness

April Fool’s Day…a day of bad jokes and silly pranks…the unofficial holiday of every class clown, every comedian and every comedy actor.  With the year nearly a quarter over, it’s time to pause and think about the ways we’ve been foolish too, especially with our priorities for the year.

foolOf course, my inner hermeticist also thinks of The Fool Card, and it’s number, zero.  What cliff am I too close to for comfort?  Am I going to tumble over, get pushed or take a flying leap? Zero–what in my life needs spring cleaning or a clean slate?

It’s foolish to pursue your dreams.  Do it anyway.

It’s foolish to choose passion over security.  Do it anyway.

It’s foolish to choose the new over the devil-you-know.  Do it anyway.

A fool that learns from their experiences–their falls–is no longer a fool  Enough falls means the beginnings of wisdom.  Get up, fall again, repeat.  I’ve had to become very “okay” with failure in the past year.  I’ve had to become very “okay” with things not working out the way I very much wanted, that some situations I wanted could not be forced into my so-called “right direction” despite my best and sincere efforts.

Failing doesn’t mean you’re a failure.  So many of us feel pressure to “make something happen” and we discount that so much of success in career, our success in relationships, or success in life in general depends on cooperating with others with right intentions and often, good timing.  You shouldn’t build a rock house on sand.  The foundation isn’t right to support the weight.  A business venture that’s too ahead of its time might languish.  A relationship where two people seem good together, but don’t have the same intentions, will often fail.   You’re only a failure if you don’t get the lesson from the experience, if you fell of the cliff without the lesson, if you’re bitter and not BETTER.

I think one of the great joys in life is being a fool, if you approach it the right way, not being reckless for the sake of being reckless. Being a good fool means that you are open to experience, good or bad, come what may, and that you have some healthy curiosity.  You don’t have to know it all.  You just have to have a lust to experience it all–or what you want of “it all”.  You’re not closed off.  So many people claim to “know” things they actually have no direct experience in whatsoever.  They’re relying on  the second-hand truths of fools who had the courage (or naivete) to ask “what if”.

adventure balance balanced balancing

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Ultimately, I think good foolishness is foolishness with intent–not just wandering for the sake of wandering, but moving with intent, even if it means you get precariously close to some cliffs from time to time, literal or emotional.  If you find yourself being foolish or accused of being foolish, check on your intent.  Is your path of action serving to grow you or is this some kind of distraction?

Happy April Fool’s Day!  Wishing you healthy foolishness and healthy curiosity now and always!

 

 

 

 

 

Deep Coughs, Deep Breaths, Deep Insights

From 12/22 to New Year’s Eve, I caught that nasty bug.  After gallons of cough syrup, mountains of tissue and a lot of rest, I’ve shook most of the nastiness off.  It’s not the first time I’ve been sick during the holidays.  However, this sickness was definitely teaching me something.

I had been keeping a breakneck pace up almost from October forward.  I had crisscrossed the country and also dealt with some decidedly un-fun situations too.  Right before I caught the bug, I felt like I was fighting nearly everything and everyone.  I was hyper-vigilant and agitated.  I feel inadequacy often, and I felt like I was steamrolling into 2019 without a plan and I was a nervous wreck in early December.  Definitely wasn’t feeling “all is calm; all is bright”.

On 12/22, there was a hot tickle in my throat that I knew wasn’t strep.  It’s funny when your throat chakra is out of whack, because it seems like everyone and everything suddenly wants to hear from you.  And there I sat, on my couch, with a a hot lump at the bottom of my throat.

As the illness progressed, it dropped into my chest and I coughed so hard at times that my sides hurt.   Of course the gunk came out in many Pantone shades of yellow to near chartreuse.  I’d tire easily and it was hard to breathe.

photo of plants on white pot

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I’d put a steamy towel on my face with eucalyptus oil and just inhale.  It helped me get up in the morning.  It would calm my cough down enough to sleep too.  I had to take time just to breathe, with full focus, with full intent.  It’s so important that we breathe, especially if in our stressful moments, especially if our tendency is to hold our breath.  Breath can heal and I was reminded of that as I journeyed with this bug.

Stillness heals too.  How often to we allow ourselves the healing that’s available in stillness–not expecting anything of ourselves, not moving, not doing?  I need more stillness in my life.  The world didn’t end because I wasn’t managing it.

 

I slept with intention.  I’ve been learning to set an intention before I sleep, especially to heal what needs healing, resolve that which needs resolving.  I had very thick, metaphoric dreams when I was ill.  I paid attention to them.  The struggle in my dream world reflected the tensions I felt when supposedly wide awake.

alcohol alcoholic beverage celebrate

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I finally shook off most of this illness on NYE.  I still have a shallow cough, but I’m mostly back to being Kristin, but Kristin with a new perspective–one that is paying attention to her breath and giving herself enough stillness.

My wish for you is that you have a wonderful, healthy, happy 2019.

Thank you for journeying with me!

 

Land of the Free?

“land of the free and the home of the brave…”

aspire posterAm I brave enough?  I ask myself this question constantly.  Am I taking the path of least resistance because it’s more convenient?  I see and hear from so many angsty people daily, in person, on my social feeds.  And sometimes, I’ve taken the primrose path of least resistance or sat on the sidelines or decided to be above the fray.

This week, I started questioning what would have happened if George Washington, Benjamin Franklin, Thomas Jefferson and the other Founders had taken the path of least resistance.  Would I be here today, enjoying (for now) my freedom of speech and freedom of the press which enables me to have a Hollywood livelihood?

I was saddened by the shootings at the Capital Gazette, but it’s not enough to be saddened.  It’s not enough to have prayers and thoughts.  Almost everyone has thoughts.  It’s what you do with those thoughts that count.  What brave action have you undertaken lately?

For me, it’s been delving into an aspect of film making I know little about:  documentary.  I am currently producing and narrating “George Hobbs:  Stick Figure Wisdom“, about Los Angeles artist George Hobbs who uses his free speech to make art that pushes back against the powers that be.

There’s a swath of people in this country who are decidedly anti-journalist and anti-media, which is why those of us in fields that depend on freedom of speech, freedom of press and freedom of information must continue to offer the truth, whether it’s heard and appreciated or not.

This Fourth of July weekend, enjoy the fireworks, but make some fireworks of your own in your own life in a metaphorical sense.  Make a big bold statement.  Make a declaration.  Speak your truth AND act on your truth.

Happy Fourth!